Sunday, October 7, 2018

KUWTK


Somehow, Bob and I successfully miss giant parts of contemporary American "culture" and survive just fine thank you. This week, despite all the news (love affairs with murdering despots, less-than-Supreme Court nominees etc etc) Bob and I discovered The Kardashians.
It was one of those weird 3 o'clock in the morning discussions that arise when we both wake up and start taking about whatever odd subject crosses our minds. I can't recall- but I'll blame Bob- which one of us said, "Just who are The Kardashians?" We started to amass the little bits and bots we both know: they seem to have big butts and large (most probably) implanted lips. There are many of them, divided into camps: Kardashians and Jenners and they have alliterative names (Khloe, Kim, Kylie, Kibble, Kanye). But what did we really know about them?
I have been able to accidentally identify a segment of the cast of players simply by standing in check-out lines and reading magazine headlines and from following the news scroll while on the Internet. They are ubiquitous (did I need to remind you?) but we had no idea that they've been on air for something like 15 years. That's impressive and says something about America's affection for stupid rich people and "reality" TV.*
Bob spend the better part of an evening watching snippets of Kardashian highlights on YouTube. We learned charming trivia about the extended tribe including ex's with names like Scott Dicksick (hey! If I had a dick it would be sick after sleeping with a Kardashian!) and the bizarre pursuit of sperm so that "all of the children would have the same father". They seem to enjoy creating artificial kontroversies and konflicts within their elaborate dynasty; the better to propagate spinoffs. I don't care if they enthrall an audience of millions, Bob and I found The Empire of Special K boring and vapid. Gosh! What will we discover next week?**



*It also partially helps to explain The Orange Menace's ascension to power.
**In all honesty, The Kardashians did keep us from dwelling on the destruction of democracy for a few hours this week.


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