Yule Logging

For no other reason than I needed out door-sy exercise, I started sawing up the downed trees in Maggie's field. Bob strained his knee and I encouraged him to forgo any serious physical exertion- like chopping and chainsawing. I took a small bow saw and started at one end.

See? I made progress. It got the blood flowing; I actually warmed up- something that's not been easy as we've had so many damp, gloomy days. I have a penchant for this sort of almost hopeless enterprise. I could wait and let Bob rip through this enormous tree with his chainsaw in a couple of minutes (and yes, he will have to do the big trunk parts!) but I like beginning at one end and plodding along a bit at a time. I think about what people did before power tools. They sawed by hand.

That's weird vortex picture! Not sure how I did that!
I also remember as a kid, getting in a small plastic boat and pushing myself around on our half frozen skating pond and playing "ice breaker". It was pretty useless, me and my miniature wooden oar smashing chunks of ice up but it was fun and I was persistent.

Maggie is shy about having her picture taken but enjoyed my spending time with her. After all, the tree is down in her field and makes it necessary to navigate around it. Maggie seems to have an unusual fascination with tools. When I feed her early in the morning, my flashlight is as interesting to her as the food. And she was very curious about the saw. It's yellow so maybe she thought it was a carrot.

In Pursuit of the Perfect Body

Yes, that's me flying through space in my self-imposed exercise regime, attempting to fight off mid-life love handles and mid-winter doldrums. I'm probably not succeeding at either as I'm sure I've been eating my way towards lumpiness, both because it's (not yet) winter and it's been cold, but also The Orange Menace provokes a certain level of anxiety in me that I suppress by consuming.

I've selected a range of DVD's from our local library, which I alternate with my own tailor-made inventive workout... part Jane Fonda/part me aerobically acting out. I have liked parts of each DVD- and disliked other parts equally. The first exercise disc I watched featured a woman who persisted in pointing out that she was on an island! it was warm! (needlessly as she was on sand, backed by rippling waves) and annoying me with her insistent arm motions. I could not for the life of me figure out what kind of weird figure 8's she was doing and I almost fell over multiple times. I'm not the most graceful being... but I try!
The yoga based one was better, and I felt good and relaxed after ward, but I think I need a bit more structure in the waist line area. Midriff bulge, muffin tops, love handles... I have successfully cultivated all three. I did both the beginner (kinda lame and too easy) and the intermediate the first time and today I combined the intermediate program with the advanced. THAT got my abdominals pumping! Saturday, I'll do my own spastic aerobic routine and then try the pilates DVD.

 As I lay on the floor, jack knifing and holding, breathing in through my nose and out through my mouth, Robin is throwing a fit in the hall. I think she thinks I'm suffering from some strange disorder. She gets plenty of exercise, running around the yard at full tilt. And I point out that despite having just celebrated a 3rd birthday, she's still young and I'm trying to be somewhat younger than my chronological years. The cold weather doesn't help! I haven't been able to go riding and due to the car dilemma, Robin and I haven't taken a walk in several weeks. (Hopefully that changes tomorrow!) Until then, here's to good health!

Dog Party

Crazy cat ladies do things like have 75 cats. Crazy dog owners dress their dogs in pajamas and drive them to play dates and have birthday parties. I will never order Robin a set of Star Wars themed dog sleepwear, but yes, I did plan a birthday party for her last Saturday.
I had originally projected inviting six dogs (and their respective humans) but three doggos were able to attend, and in retrospect, that was probably plenty. We provided cupcakes and crackers and dip for the humans and I wrapped small treats for the canines. I took the precaution of hiding most of Robin's toys and not offering too much in the way of dog edibles so as to prevent spats and aggression. This was probably smart on my part as Lil Robin seemed to discover that she could growl. In fact, Robin (who had previously met and played with all three of the dogs in attendance) decided she wasn't spectacularly happy with so many dog "frenemies" in her living room! Our friend Mary- who accompanied her dog Izzie- suggested that poor Robin was worried that this pack of dogs was here to stay... in her house!

Here's the guest of honor attempting to escape her collected friends. Here nose looked even longer than usual. It took her most of the afternoon to decide that a birthday party was okay. But the other dogs seemed to have a swell time:

Emily looked quite pleased. She is a delightful peachy pumpkin colored girl and seemed to beam the entire time... at least someone enjoyed themselves! And Emmett- quite dapper in his orange winter suit- liked being the only boy surrounded by lovely lady dogs. (His human, Michelle had fun, too. She made delicious brownies for us humans. We were pretty well behaved- no snapping or growling!)

Emmett appears bigger in this picture than he really is. I think he weighs all of 12 pounds! And our other guest was Izzie, a spunky and entertaining terrier mix who I was unable to get a good picture of. I seem to have taken a few blurry ones, probably because Izzie was always on the move.

That's Izzie (behind Emmett) in the yellow poncho, scarfing up bits of food dropped on the floor. At least I didn't have to vacuum! We attempted a group photo, but quickly abandoned the idea as our assembled guests were unwillingly to sit and stay. But I had a good time! I like to party with a pack!

In addition to turkey legs and wild thing dog jerky and happy birthday bones and assorted treats, I gave Robin an entertaining squeaky snake (squeaks in three places!) after her friends departed. It was a big hit: as we went upstairs to retire for the evening, Robin chose the snake to bring along and has been making quite a happy racket with it ever since. I guess I made a good choice!

The Tree Guys Returneth

Oh no!! Not again! Yes, we have more vast piles of sticks, trunks, branches and logs to remove from our yard. We do have our work cut out for us. But we're happy! We rejoice! Because they did come back and did a swell job. (We've been waiting for a few months, as you may recall. The tree guys were busy and the weather was against us. I guess we can also admit that it was nice to have a break in between gigantic clean up duties...)
Here are some action shots:

And they were wicked fast. The arrived shortly after 9:00 am and by 10:30 they were done and gone.

They worked fast but were remarkably accurate and careful. As we watched out the window, Bob
said, "I guess you can say goodbye to the little Japanese black pine you planted there." And I opined philosophically that was probably the price of having gambled and planted right where they were eventually dropping trees. But much to my wondering eyes, when I examined the scene of all this mayhem, the little pine was fine! It was surrounded by branches and debris but utterly unscathed. And all the rhododendrons were fine, too. (Which makes me doubly happy because they have finally grown and they all have buds.) Good job!

Boy, I could never do this: these guys are thirty feet up in the air in a bucket and it's windy and they're swinging a chain saw around. Not my idea of fun.
We had requested that they leave the trunks about 8 to 10 feet tall because I have this (half crazy) idea that I am going to apply mosaic to them, like we did on the pathway. I'm psyched but was a little disappointed that the one dangerous, precariously leaning tree was left- leaning- but about 10 feet tall. I remarked to Bob that I should have asked them to take that one all the way down. But he pointed out that that was actually the TOP of one of the trees they had dropped, and it had landed upside down, stuck in the ground. Wow.

There's Bob watching the last tree being removed. Bob is so smart; we had taken a walk in our woods the other day, searching for an Xmas tree. We tentatively picked one out, but I think we both felt badly sacrificing a nice living tree for a couple of weeks of joy. So then Bob says, "Why don't we fabricate a tree from the fallen pines and spruces?" What a genius idea! The constructed tree looks really good* and is ready to come in a be decorated. A win/win and it didn't cost us anything (except the money to have the tree guys visit.)

To be featured in an upcoming post.

Work Related

Just look at the cool dragon I scored at work! A nice perk has always been the ability to purchase (generally reasonably) interesting stuff. We joke at work that you have to be a "stuff person" to work at an auction house... otherwise it will overload your circuits and you'll go crazy. There is a lot of stuff in the world. The other truth of an auction house is that if you wait long enough, the same thing (or something very similar!) will come along. It's down right weird when we have an auction and get several identical objects consigned by different people. Last year we had the same Lalique vase twice in one sale and just last month, we had two nearly identical wooden swans from different estates. (How many of us have large wooden swans hanging around?!)
As many of you know, I have liked my job. I hope to be able to continue to do so but there are strange things afoot. Despite The Orange Menace constantly crowing about how swell the economy is doing, the auction that I work at seems to be floundering a bit. I understand that the auction world is changing and people are getting smarter about selling their own things on Ebay and Craig's List, and there are thirty million online auctions now...
Here's some really lovely fabric that I got- for a song. Even if I only used it as a backing for an art piece, it would still be a steal; there's over a yard and it's wide.

Anyway, I'm having my hours whittled and it doesn't make me happy. (And just in time for the holidays and the darkest, most brutish time of the year!!) Let's hope things pick up in the near future.

And here's "Steve". I pulled him out of the dumpster behind the auction. It is truly a source for strange things, and No, I did not name him "Steve"*. Look at the back of his neck:

See? I guess my point is how enriched my material world has been while working at the auction. Not only do I get to collect unusual and various things, I get to handle- and photograph- all sorts of delightful and museum-worthy items. I have developed a real appreciation for stuff I'll never own (nor particularly want to): like silverware and Chinese vases and ugly settees. They're all fun to absorb for a few minutes and then they go on their way.
Additionally, I feel entirely too jaded and exhausted to think of looking for another job. I have job-related baggage and little or no desire to have to become a perky and accommodating job applicant at this stage of my life! This has been a good, three-day-a-week job for an artist like me... don't make me start over now!!!!

*Steve is still living in my office at work. I have a prodigious collection of flotsam and ephemera that embellishes my work room, including a large drawing of Lenin and primitive Band-Aid art... and bugs! And teeth! And odd pictures of people grasping cats by their necks!

Thanksgiving Meat Feast

Can anyone tell me why this outlandish and frankly disgusting outer garment keeps showing up in the side border of our email? Bob and I have shopped online for boots and dog leashes and flower bulbs but neither one of us has searched for "jackets that look like marbled slabs of beef". Here's a fashion shot, featuring a contraposto male, just itchin' to show his meat off to some lucky lady:

Fetching, isn't it? And for some truly weird advertising, there seems to be "Arby's" embroidered on his left chest... Do they require employees to wear these smocks at work? Wouldn't that convince more people to eschew the consumption of meat? Hasn't anyone followed the downer cow/mad cow/Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease connection!?!?!?
I take into consideration that it is Thanksgiving tomorrow (be thankful that these ads have not been turning up in your email!) and hunting season is probably in full metal jacket swing, but we're not eating red meat anyway. We're having Chicken Marbella for dinner. Try printing chicken thighs on a jacket! (Or on second thought, don't!)
Okay... here's (I'm assuming) the same company doing themselves even one better if that was possible. Ready for this? (I think not: it was 6:00 am when I first saw this and almost screamed out loud.)

Yes, that's a jacket printed to look like the naked, incredibly hirsute fat middle aged white guy. Oh please! My eyesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Seriously? Who designs this stuff?) I guess this jacket is the logical rejoinder to red meat; a little white flesh, anyone? And would you enjoy a side serving of prions? Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Okay, okay... there's one more (incredibly enough) article of clothing in this line... you know the old jokes about how you don't want to see sausages being made? How about your anorak?

Early Winter

Just in case anyone slept late and missed the joy of waking up to five inches of slushy snow and rain and sleet and generally miserable conditions outside, I'll present a few pictures. How about we didn't get a measly inch or two- the proverbial "dusting"- but instead went for the full-blown, all out winter presentation: Look at this mess!

There's Robin, looking like she's lost in Alaska. She alone among us professes to like the snow. I suppose when one is young and carefree, snow is a blast. Robin does enjoy being toweled off (and given a dog treat) when she comes back in. No one gives Bob or me a dog treat when we come back in... but then again, Bob made French toast and the house smelled divinely like cinnamon and maple when I came back in from feeding Maggie.

Wow! I hadn't even thought about how monochromatic our world is when it snows... just shades of grey. It's hard to believe that just Wednesday, I was planting bulbs and raking leaves and Bob was splitting wood. I sure hope that this early snow storm isn't a harbinger of a long, cold, snowy winter to come. Yikes!

*At least I'm taking the day off from work. The drive in would be a nightmare! (Besides whne I called in, no one answered the phone.) Bob maintains you can't snow blow this sort of heavy wet stuff. But you sure as hell can't shovel it, either! Maybe (wishful thinking) it will melt??!?!?