End of Year Resolutions- Bah!!

Hey! Looks like we're about to resolve to make resolutions!
That unfortunate man (above) is my latest acquisition for my "bad painting" collection. I know; it's sort of trendy circa 1989 to collect bad art, but I'm an artist and I can do whatever I want. In any event, this poor wonker looks like he's got syphilis and bug bites and a co-worker suggested he looks like he's stuck in the outhouse, so he's got all KINDS of trouble. My year hasn't been that bad...
So, do I really make resolutions? Do I keep those resolutions that I make? I try.
For the umpteenth million time, I resolve to make more money. Not loads more, just MORE whatever that is. (Rule #1: Set the bar realistically low, then you can actually accomplish the goal. Like if I resolve to generate a million zillion dollars this upcoming year, I expect I'll fail. But if I vow to make a few measly thousand dollars more than this waning year, I have a good chance of success. That's the name of the game).
But ouch! that shows where my values lie, if money is Numero Uno resolution. Hmm... how about being nicer and more compassionate to my fellow (thoroughly awful, despicable, gun-toting) men and women kinds? (Whoa! What did I just say about realistic, achievable goals?)
Okay, maybe I'll settle for the hackneyed (but do-able) ideal of loosing a few of those jiggly pounds and maybe drinking a tad less at social functions? THAT I think I can manage...
That's enough for me! I'm going downstairs and join my beloved Bob for a glass of some kind of bubbly and what looks to be a really nice meal. To hell with resolutions tonight!

Are We Ready For This?

Yes, that is what you think it is... a large pile of fluffy white stuff that has been pushed through elaborate mechanical means to a heap at the end of the driveway. And we pay people to do this!  I can think of all sorts of things I'd rather be spending money on right now: vacations in the south of anywhere warm, saving towards my eventual studio, even that crown I so badly need on a left rear molar. But instead we must pay to rearrange frozen water molecules that given a few months would melt on their own.
I am sorry; I'm still crabby and not enjoying this foray into winter. Where is Climate Change when you want it? The weather did serve to keep my indoors where I played (quite happily, it must be admitted) in my studio where I made several collages. I think I'll post a couple tomorrow; I have been exploring that irksome fiscal cliff and all the implications for us 99%ers. You'll see!
Meanwhile, I am confessing that I wanted to do nothing more than ride my splendid steed through snow banks, large and small. It was just too damned cold- and windy- to even be considered. Maggie looked bored and stood with her butt to the wind all afternoon. There was the constant drone of snow mobiles from next door as our neighbor and his son circled their house endlessly, dreaming of Arctic conquest. In short, a day at the end of the year!

A Ramblin' Endish O' Yearish Postish

So I can't report that I have much to report, but the weather is so blasted awful that I thought it would serve us all right if I posted a cranky end of December post. (That, by the way, is a fuzzy flower computer drawing to make us all forget about the ice and snow that persists outside...)
We missed what was no doubt a lovely Boxing Day party last night at our good friend John's house. I'm sorry to have not be available to chat up close friends and hear tales of their Xmas day festivities, but I must admit that staying in due to inclement weather offered it's own low key charms. For example, I didn't consume (further) vast quantities of rich and/or sauced, cheesed, seasoned, oozing food stuffs. I think I am swelling in this end of year binge-i-ness. Like many others, I regret my extreme lack of self control!
However, soon enough the Christmas cookies (remember those?) and the chocolates and the dips and snacks will have vanished like yesterdays snows.... or so we can hope!
I expect to sign on to the old New Year's Resolution band wagon and vow not to let anything more digestively strenuous than water and thin gruel pass my lips for at least a fortnight. But in the next couple of days, Bob and I seem to be finishing off that box of chocolates that we were given...
What else? Can someone please remind me to take my camera with me when I think of doing interesting stuff? Like yesterday I had a wonderful time riding Maggie in the snow and today on my morning ramble with Jules, we saw the neighborhood bobcat, up close and personal. Woulda made great pictures! Maybe that's my New Year's Resolution: bring the camera along!

So Hungry I could Eat A...

Ooops! Sorry Maggie; only kidding! (She doesn't look amused at my lame joke!) I am happy to report
 that- just in time for consuming loads and loads of Christmas goodies (and baddies) I am cured and feel fine. My appetite has returned, along with my usual high spirits. It was a weird "bug" and I subsisted on a diet of (boxed) mashed potatoes and white meat chicken, and a bit of Bob's bread and apple sauce; you will notice the entirely beige complexion of the food I ingested. But whatever! It worked and I am anticipating our trip to Byron and Dan's for a lovely Christmas Eve celebration.
Last year, Byron and Dan regaled us with a multi-course epicurean escapade with fish and cheese and fruit and wine and cordials and nuts and roots and tubers and berries and things in bowls and on trays. It was really wonderful. Fortunately, we didn't embarrass ourselves badly enough that they saw fit to invite others to dine in our stead... Good friends for the holidays!
Now I am off to my studio to try and complete a collage, again about financial mayhem in our present peering over that dang-nabbed cliff. I say give them a good push!
Then I must prepare for tonight's repast. I will probably wear my new leggings:

I got so excited! I loved this print and they had them in the grey in my size, which I bought. The red was equally fabulous, but only in large and extra large. So I contacted my sister Beatrice and she scored them for me at her local (get this) KMart... and they were on sale! The things we worry about in the holiday season. God bless us, everyone!

In Which The World Does Not End and I Take Sick

So I begin to experience symptoms that I first attribute to the consumption of too much cookie dough while preparing greasy lumps of sugar for the Cookie Exchange at work. And as a true Lover of All Kinds of Cookies, you can only imagine my despair at being unable to attend and swap out my Ornamented Sugar Cookies with Colored Sugar and Creme de Menthe Chocolate Chip Cookies for equally elaborate and delightful extravagances. (I must be very ill indeed; I'm playing with needless formatting!)
Anyway, the feelings that I was feeling did not abate after a reasonable time, but worsened. I became seriously nauseous and started getting chills. Bob and Jules and I attempted to watch a movie, but I bagged and simply lay in bed freezing and wishing for the deliverance that a mighty hurl would bring.
We slept for hours, and upon awakening, I felt no better, nay worse. My head is killing me and I continue shivering and dizzy. I forced myself to consume a piece of Bob's bread simply to enable my ingesting Ibuprofen in an effort to rein in the thundering headache.
It doesn't help that the weather is abominable- worthy of the end of the Mayan calendar. It is pouring rain, driving wind and general unpleasantness. As with the hurricane last year, the odd direction of the wind has forced rain backwards through the door in my studio and there is a major puddle on the floor beneath our Christmas tree. Even poor Jules, despondent that we are unable to take our daily walk, seems less than enthusiastic about a trip outside.
Bob has been dispatched to our local supermarket to procure provisions should I live. I figured some external corroboration that the world had indeed not ended was in order. Although I did call in sick to work and someone who sounded remarkably like my co-worker Erica (and not a Mayan deity) answered. Alas! All those lovely cookies beyond my grasp!

The Two Things of Christmas, Maybe Three

Okay, repeat after me (I sound like a broken record), "The two things that make me feel anything remotely Xmas-y are the 1.) Christmas Cookies, and 2.) The Tree." As you can see, the first batch of Christmas Thing #1 is pictured above. I have now consumed so much dough that I feel vaguely bilious, but that's a good thing! There's a second batch on the way.
And look! What to my wondering eye should appear:

Away in a corner, surrounded by Tibetan prayer flags, no less! So now I do (kinda) feel a bit Christmas-y. And I'm finishing up our Annual Christmas Card Extravaganza. That takes time and energy as we still insist on hand-making all the cards. But they're all small creations and that's a good thing to send off into the universe. I believe that the influence exerted by making and sending something carefully hand made is priceless (like those credit card ads!). I really (mostly) enjoy making the cards; maybe once every five years or so, we grumble and "take a vacation" and purchase a box of pre-mades. This was definitely not one
of those years!
Tomorrow is the shortest day of the year, the winter solstice, and, apparently, the last day of life on earth. Or the end of the world... something big! We'll see! Our friend Joe is coming by to celebrate darkness and doom with us. At least we'll go out in style!

Cheer Me Up, Batman

Yes, this is supposed to be a happy time of year. Various holidays occur, we are permitted to overindulge and there are pretty lights and even some presents. But what with things like mass shootings and general craziness, sometimes it's hard to feel good.
Silliness is an important antidote. Jules is supremely good at silliness. Witness these (sorta out of focus) pictures (well, he wouldn't hold still and was showing off!).

Jules is very jealous now that Maggie the Horse is here. He knows I like her, even though I point out that she has to live outside and he comes in and sleeps in the bedroom with us. So every time I go to the store to buy horsey food, I come home with another bag of tennis balls for Jules. The back yard is riddled with them, as is the house. He guards them like a little dragon, that's why he's rolling around.

Just look at him! Making a selection or counting them. And believe me, that's a pathetic fraction of the thirty plus balls he now has. I should take a detail of the ones that Jules has deconstructed.
They look like dinosaur eggs, gathered together into a nest.

At least he's cheerful and he keeps our spirits up. Don't tell Jules, but I got him more balls for Christmas!

Future Xmas Trees

We still have no Christmas tree! As I've mentioned several hundred times, there are only two requirements for me to be assured of a holly, jolly Christmas: cookies (and lots of them, carefully decorated) and a tree. I'm beginning to work on Phase 1 (cookies) as we're having a cookie exchange at work and I need an assortment for giving and eating. (All that dough! A bizarre gift to myself!)
As far a Phase 2, I wandered the property yesterday late morning potentially thinking maybe I'd stumble upon the perfect- yet easily sacrificed- tree. All I found were ones like above, or below:

Like perfect for a hundred years from now! So Bob is going to try and fell a tall tree that's dead all the way up until five or six feet from the top. That way we get fence posts AND a Christmas tree. Believe me, we won't miss the tree in question; it's sort of hidden in a bunch of other scraggly spruces.
In the meantime, here's a pretty picture of our small pond, freezing over in the chilly morning.

Hard to think of such things now, but due to the generosity of a few friends, there are irises planted in the "mucka" (Bob's word) at the edge of the pond. Next spring should be very pretty!

A Long Way Down

Here's what it looks like if you're lucky enough (or crazy enough!) to get on a horse. Maggie is listening to me as I had to take the camera out of the case and change the settings and then take a picture. But she's very good! Really quiet and sane... not like certain other equines whose name we will not mention. Ahem.
And on that note, I had what no doubt would have been a major disaster had I not been riding a real good little horse like Maggie. As I mosey-ed up the driveway, our neighbor's enthusiastic LARGE chocolate Lab spotted me and Maggie and decided that we were too weird to pass up and he came bounding through the hole in the fence barking vociferously. A less experienced horse would (possibly) have freaked but Maggie stood her ground, not liking Chops the Dog's attentions particularly, but not (over) reacting. What a good girl; she earned her carrots!
I am making my way back to the position that riding is really fun. Crispin (Oops! Don't think I was naming names) was a tad spooky (I'm being polite). I got scared a few two many times by his spookiness and began anticipating... which does not make for relaxed riding.  After my eye injury, I was told by one of my surgeons that I'd be crazy to ever ride again but Hell! I can't go around avoiding things I love. It worked out in terms of a good reason to avoid the riding of a horse that shied at everything; that would have been just looking for trouble! So trading seems an inspired answer. I'm still waiting for a vet check (this Thursday) of Maggie to make sure everything's in the right place and working correctly. Until then, despite the chilly wet weather I'm having a really good time!
And yes, even on a small horse, the ground looks like a long way down!

Artist's Rendering

Here is an artist's rendering of our new horse, Maggie. I pointed to my beloved Bob that he probably never expected to have even one horse in his life time, and here he is, onto a second horse! And for someone who never thought to have dogs, Bob is well onto what? his fourth dog. (That doesn't count Archie who was my dog in college and beyond and accompanied us to Bridgewater. He died there, after a year at age 16 or 17!)
So Bob is becoming quite the animal expert; next thing, he'll be begging us to get a cat. Or chickens. Or that alpaca...
So until that vet check on the 12th of December, I'm happy with Maggie. I am trusting the vet does not turn up any really awful unanticipated surprises. I was told she was around 15, but I suspect she's a but older, which is okay. I did some research on the web and here's an interesting fact about determining a horse's age by their teeth. Of course, I've always heard that was a semi-reliable way to tell but I thought there was a bit of voodoo or something involved, in which horse whisperers and other sages were able to read teeth like tea leaves. But there is actually a formation called Galvyne's Groove that helps to give a somewhat accurate read. (Boy I love the Internet!) This groove appears on the side of a horse's teeth at about age ten. By 15, the groove is half way down the tooth. At about age 20, the groove is all the way down. After 20, the top line of the tooth is clear and the groove is only present in the lower half of the tooth. In very advanced old age, the groove disappears entirely. Now you can impress all your friend's with a morsel of horse knowledge. So I'm guess-timating that Maggie is about 17 or 18 by the length of her Galvyne's Groove. (She wasn't super cooperative about my looking in her mouth but I managed!)
Maggie is great fun to ride but she isn't the easiest horse to catch! She's smart and on to my tricks. If I get the saddle and bridle out, she walks very purposefully away, down into the field and will allow you to approach- but not too close. She has this figured out. So I tried a bucket (empty) a carrot extended. Boy did she stretch and reach for that carrot, but I couldn't get the lead rope over her neck. Finally, I pretended to lose interest and I got the wheelbarrow and started cleaning up the field. The she got all nosy; she never suspected that I had the halter in the wheelbarrow! And she's fine about tacking up after you get her, and even seems to enjoy the ride. I'm certain we'll come to an understanding.

Head First Over the (gasp!) Fiscal Cliff!

As I mentioned to all of my Facebook-abiding friends, I love phrases like "The Fiscal Cliff". Someone dreams up these slogans for some dire event on our horizon and that's all you here for a few weeks or maybe months. Like "credit default swaps". Or "QE2" (which I initially thought was that big cruise ship). As quickly as they spiral into virality, they flame out and no one ever utters them again. When was the last time the phrase "zombie bank" crossed your lips?
So it is my (self appointed) role as Guardian of Today's Meaningless Phrase to immortalize these terms in works of art. (See the detail above; I'm in the middle of this piece and I'm psyched! I could use a week or so off from work to complete it). Other works are to follow and are in process on my studio tables. "Sequestration" is next up! (Who invented that? I was on the Internet checking on how to spell such a monstrosity!)
I am certain we all appreciate that these disasters, financial and otherwise, are all cooked up by Congress people with nothing better to do than create games of brinksmanship. All are zero-sum exercises that neither this side nor that will "win". I just hope that President Obama holds his line, does not capitulate (as he was far too willing to due during his first term) and drives those crazy republicans over the edge. Why is it that people with the least money and the most to lose seem inspired to believe the lies and self-serving policies of the greediest rich? At present, the republicans want to raise the age of social security, raise taxes on all of us (underachievers!), eliminate things like mortgage deductions and doom us all to penury so that they (who never need rely on social security or medicare) can keep more of their filthy lucre. Now why there hasn't been a revolution is beyond me; I suppose Fox News, TV in general and shopping at the malls for Xmas has trumped any real concern for "our future".
But hey! At least it gives me fodder for my artistic mill. Now I need to go check the spelling on "sequestration".

What's For Supper?

This is what happens when you send me to the store! I return with Evil Donuts! (And to make them even evil-er, they were marked down! Well, at least I'm not crazy enough to pay full price for food nonsense!)
I am hungry and I am wondering what we will eat as Bob isn't home yet and he is the Master Chef. As we have covered in previous postings, I eat and wash dishes; Bob pretty much cooks serious food offerings. I can be counted on to provide, yes, comic relief and non-regulation delicacies such as cookies, cakes, muffins and fruit. I can prepare fruit!
In any event, it was a nice day and I finally got warm after several days of bone chilling dampness that made me want to overeat something fierce. Made me want to eat... evil donuts. (We did put the donuts in the oven and they were far better slightly warm.)
So Maggie the Horse has eaten, Jules the Dog has eaten. What's for supper?!!
A footnote: (several hours later): I actually made dinner and we had (canned) vegetable soup and grilled cheese sandwiches. Sounds like grade school!

New Horse, Old Joke

Welcome to maggie the Horse! Not a great picture, but what a sweet little horse! Just what the doctors ordered! Maggie is so much the opposite of Crispin: small(er), dark (almost black), a mare (vs. a gelding) and cheerful. Crispin seemed grouchy- or at least preoccupied- much of the time. And he wasn't happy on his own here, always pacing and looking for a friend (other than me). He was uneasy being ridden "in the wild" and as I don't have a riding ring, Crispin and I had an awkward and unsatisfactory arrangement. Like a bad relationship! Neither party is terrible, just wrong for each other. I am assured that he's happier now, back in a "stable" environment.
Maggie on the other hand, is quiet and sane and thinks things over before reacting. I have to seriously consider my safety while doing bizarre things like climbing on the back of a 800 plus pound animal and galloping off into the sunset. I don't have an extra eye and I'm not looking for pyrotechnics and extreme sporting events... just a mosey up the trail and the occasional joyous canter. I think I've found a partner.
Fortunately, my tack fit Maggie just fine. She's smaller than Crispin, but not that much so Crispin's girth is simply up a billet hole or two. The bridle was funny, though. Maggie has a very long face so I actually had to drop the caveson and check straps down for her. But the bit fit fine. (Reminds one of the old joke about a horse walking into the bar...)
The vet is coming to check her in a week or so and we're hoping for a clean bill of health. In the meantime, I wish the weather would cooperate and give me a couple of warm(er), sunny days. It's been darned chilly riding the last couple of weeks!

Hi! Where Have I Been?

Only at BobnRita's BauHaus Chicken Coop will you see something like this! I am lucky (you don't know HOW lucky) that Bob bakes fresh homemade bread every week. The house smells wonderful and nothing beats pulling a fresh French stick apart and spreading butter that melts as it's being applied... Sorry Wonderbread!
Sometimes in chilly weather, the dough is reluctant and doesn't rise well. Bob then searches for the warmer parts of our house, in this case my studio as the wood stove is there. (You can see my table oozing bits of collage material). The pedestal was optional, but it made for a better picture and freed me to use my table.
But it's been busy what with Thanksgiving and work and studio work and the arrival of the New Horse, aka Maggie. More on her in a later posting.
So good intentions aside, we've been involved in the business of preparing for winter. I planted tulips bulbs (including some exotic red parrot forms that I have never tried before. Damn I hate waiting for spring!) and weatherizing the windows and getting fire wood. Cold weather and drizzly days drive me indoors to other projects. Hopefully I'll be a bit more diligent in my bloggery...